The committee has asked me to prepare you for today. In light of the fact that we all indeed love our kids, it is inevitable that we will on occasion have a day such as today, because, as we all now, and as 80's rock star Pat Benatar so eloquently put it, "Love is a Battlefield". So, ladies and gentlemen, prepare yourselves. Hunker down, get a stock of supplies ready, because today is going to be a rough one.
Good night, and good luck.
The Decider
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